After several years films that depict puerile acts of self-abuse and
humiliation are starting to wear me down. I’m just about at the point where I
find myself laughing at the ridiculous antics of people like Johnny Knoxville,
Steve-O, and the other self-proclaimed jackasses. Perhaps with all the pressing
matters in the world today we all could use just a touch of grade school gross
out humor. Let’s face it, movies like Jackass Number Two make the Three Stooges
look like intelligent comedians. When you look at the series of stunts that
these men perform you can see that such classics influenced them as the Stooges,
Tom & Jerry and Wild E. Coyote. Usually, blowing yourself up, hitting each other
with heavy objects and slamming one another in sensitive body parts can be funny
in the context of cartoons. However, in real life, the thought of performing
these actions would certainly make most of us watching think that their mommas
must have dropped these boys on their heads a few times too many and they came
to enjoy it. This motley group of misfits consists of Johnny Knoxville, Steve-O,
Bam Margera, Chris Pontius, Dave England, Ryan Dunn, Wee Man, Preston Lacy and
Ehren McGhehey. I estimate that between the whole group of them there just may
be a dozen or so brain cells left functioning. The rest of their gray matter has
been pummeled and pounded into one a slurry oozing out of their orifices. There
are always warnings with films and television shows like this admonishing those
watching not to attempt to duplicate anything shown. These untrained individuals
rather some just some guys with more beer than common sense, and it might be
better for the gene pool in general if those that consider these stunts
something to emulate just went on and removed themselves from the procreation
process due to generalized genital damage.
The first stunt demonstrates just why we need not be overly concerned that
these fellows will pass on their genes. The stunt is called ‘Puppet Show.' In
this one, Chris Pontius covers his manhood with a piece cloth that has a mouse
face drawn on it as the string is attached. Knoxville then proceeds to yank the
string with more force than necessary to jerk the member around in erratic
motions. While this sounds extremely perverse, these are idiots experienced in
self-harm to elicit humorous results.The macabre demands of their fans require
the troupe must continuously escalate the level of pain and repulsive nature of
their performances. Chris makes his disguised member in front of a snake while
Johnny pulls the string. The first couple of strikes of the snake miss but soon
enough the fangs sink in, Chris howls in pain and leaves with the snake still
attached to his crotch.
As mentioned some the inspiration and I use that term in the loosest of all
possible senses, comes from cartoons. We have all seen the bit where Bugs Bunny
or the Roadrunner plants a boxing glove on a spring for their witless opponents.
Here the guys create a real version. In the hotel where the guys are staying
some of the cast lay a trap for the others. They put a message on the wall,
ostensibly from a female fan that wants to become intimate with them. As the
unsuspecting victim reads the message, he bends over until he is face to face
with a hidden boxing glove on a pneumatic spring. The victim is hit in the face,
and the perpetrators jump out for a laugh. After so many years of these stunts,
the guys are building up quite a variety of scars. This installment details the
infliction of a few additions to the collection. While on a ranch Ryan Dunn gets
the idea that Bam Margera should be branded like the cattle. The group comes up
with a cookie cutter like brand crudely shaped like male genitalia. With the use
of a propane touch, they heat it up while Bam bends over. After a few attempts,
there are several overlapping scars on his bare buttocks. All of this is
performed while Bam’s parents, Phil and April Margera. I can only imagine what
was going through their minds at that moment; most likely that they should have
opted for some form of birth control on the night they conceived their son.
What would a Jackass flick be without bodily fluids? This time around they
sink to new lows that are bound to revolt even those with strong stomachs. In
the bit aptly called ‘How to Milk a Horse,' Chris Pontius collects a specimen
from a particularly ready stallion and inquiries if it is safe to drink. This
stunt is so disgusting that even Knoxville gags and Steve-O toss his cookies.
Pontius notes that he was ashamed of his actions here. Other notable moments in
bodily functions include Steve-O wearing an airtight mask attached to a tube and
forced to breathe in the flatulence and ode du feces of his friends. If this was
not enough Steve-O vomits while wearing the contraption. What is amazing is
there is a band of attractive young women who practically throw themselves at
the boys. Most fathers would rather their daughters do something more socially
acceptable like being a crack whore instead of seeing them enamored of these
fellows. What girls could watch what these guys do to themselves and each other
and say to themselves, ‘there is the man of my dreams!’
There is little to hold the isolated acts together, pretty much the same as
anything in the Jackass franchise. Admittedly, I am not in the target
demographic for this film. It is geared towards a younger viewer especially
those that have consumed a copious quantity of alcoholic beverages. Yes, I did
laugh, I admitted it. It is sophomoric, stupid and ridiculous but very few will
be able to subdue the laughs entirely.
Paramount has given this DVD release their best effort. The video and audio
are uneven, but it is the digital format not the fault of the mastering. There
are three variations available; full-screen widescreen and unrated. Naturally,
you will want the unrated with all the gory details. There are a lot of extras
provided including a cast commentary. Here the guys seemed to have gotten
various illicit substances and imbibed as they watch the film. There are also
several making of featurettes and additional material. This is one to watch when
you have some friends over for beer and pizza. It is rude, crude and socially
unacceptable. I would say keep it out of the hands of the teens, but you know
they have their copy. If your inner child has a severe sick streak, then this
one is right for you!