Jackass Number Two

After several years films that depict puerile acts of self abuse and humiliation are starting to wear me down. I’m just about at the point where I find myself laughing at the ridiculous antics of people like Johnny Knoxville, Steve-O and the other self proclaimed jackasses. Perhaps with all the serious matters in the world today we all could use just a touch of grade school gross out humor. Let’s face it, movies like Jackass Number Two make the Three Stooges look like intelligent comedians. When you look at the series of stunts that these men perform you can see that they were influenced by such classics as the Stooges, Tom & Jerry and Wild E. Coyote. Now blowing yourself up, hitting each other with heavy objects and slamming one another in sensitive body parts is funny in cartoons even the thought of acting these scenarios out in real life does make most of us watching think that their mommas must have dropped these boys on their heads a few times too many and they came to enjoy it. This motley group of misfits consists of Johnny Knoxville, Steve-O, Bam Margera, Chris Pontius, Dave England, Ryan Dunn, Wee Man, Preston Lacy and Ehren McGhehey. I estimate that between the whole group of them there just may be a dozen or so brain cells left functioning. The rest of their grey matter has been pummeled and pounded into one a slurry oozing out of their orifices. There are always warnings with films and television shows like this admonishing those watching not to attempt to duplicate anything shown. These are not trained professional, they are just some guys with more beer than common sense and it might be better for the gene pool in general if those that consider these stunts something to emulate just went on and removed themselves from the procreation process due to generalized genital damage.

The first stunt demonstrates just why we need not be overly concerned that these fellows will pass on their genes. The stunt is called ‘Puppet Show’. In this one Chris Pontius covers his member with some cloth that has a mouse face drawn on it. To his manhood a sting is attached so that Knoxville can make it jump around. While this sounds perverse enough these are experienced idiots and have to take things further over the line. Chris takes his disguised member in front of a snake while Johnny pulls the string. The first couple of strikes of the snake miss but soon enough the fangs sink in, Chris howls in pain and leaves with the snake still attached.

As mentioned some the inspiration and I use that term in the loosest of all possible senses, comes from cartoons. We have all seen the bit where Bugs Bunny or the Roadrunner plants a boxing glove on a spring for their witless opponents. Here the guys create a real version. In the hotel where the guys are staying some of the cast lay a trap for the others. They put a message on the wall, ostensibly from a female fan that wants to become intimate with them. As the unsuspecting victim reads the message he bends over until he is face to face with a hidden boxing glove on a pneumatic spring. The victim is hit in the face and the perpetrators jump out for a laugh.

After so many years of these stunts the guys are building up quite a variety of scars. This installment details the infliction of a few additions to the collection. While on a ranch Ryan Dunn gets the idea that Bam Margera should be branded like the cattle. The group comes up with a cookie cutter like brand crudely shaped like male genitalia. Using a propane torch they heat it up while Bam bends over. After a few attempts there are several overlapping scars on his bare buttocks. All of this is performed while Bam’s parents, Phil and April Margera. I can only imagine what was going through their minds at that moment; most likely that they should have opted for some form of birth control on the night they conceived their son.

What would a Jackass flick be without bodily fluids? This time around they sink to new lows that are bound to revolt even those with strong stomachs. In the bit aptly called ‘How to Milk a Horse’, Chris Pontius collects a specimen from a particularly ready stallion and inquiries if it is safe to drink. This stunt is so disgusting that even Knoxville gags and Steve-O tosses his cookies. Pontius notes that he was ashamed of his own actions here. Other notable moments in bodily functions includes Steve-O wearing an airtight mask attached to a tube and forced to breath in the flatulence and ode du feces of his friends. If this was not enough Steve-O vomits while wearing the contraption. What is truly amazing is there are a band of attractive young women who practically throw themselves at the boys. Most fathers would rather their daughters do something more socially acceptable like being a crack whore instead of seeing them enamored of these fellows. What girls could watch what these guys do to themselves and each other and say to themselves, ‘there is the man of my dreams!’

There is little to hold the isolated acts together, pretty much the same as anything in the Jackass franchise. Admittedly, I am not in the target demographic for this film. It is geared towards a younger viewer especially those that have consumed a copious quantity of alcoholic beverages. Yes, I did laugh, I admitted it. It is sophomoric, stupid and ridiculous but very few will be able to completely subdue the laughs.

Paramount has given this DVD release their best effort. The video and audio is uneven but it is the digital format not the fault of the mastering. There are three variations available; full screen widescreen and unrated. Naturally, you will want the unrated with all the gory details. There are a lot of extras provided including a cast commentary. Here the guys seemed to have gotten various illicit substances and imbibed as they watch the film. There are also several making of featurettes and additional material. This is one to watch when you have some friends over for beer and pizza. It is rude, crude and socially unacceptable. I would say keep it out of he hands of the teens but you know they have their own copy. If your inner child has a serious sick streak then this one is right for you!

Posted 12/19/06